When life gives you lemons, but lemons aren’t for you
The way that modern society is structured means that for a lot of people, we end up in a cyclical routine, sometimes without meaning to and very often to the detriment of our own happiness.
This is the nine to five mentality, the wake up, go to work and then go to bed routine. If you love routine and you love your job – and your life – then this is perfect. If you don’t, you’re probably in a rut, and the steps it takes to get out of that rut can seem endless. When we’re used to getting what we want as soon as we ask for it, sticking to the follow through after making a decision can just feel all too hard.
This is amplified in a city like London in a way I haven’t experienced before; with any kind of food I want delivered to my house in less than an hour, and next day delivery for online shopping just as standard, it makes the feeling that you might be approaching a rut all that more real. And if you lay out the steps it takes to escape, chances are that the light at the end of the tunnel is seeming further and further away.
My Journey of Escape
The road that led me to move to London was a long one. It started when I was a kid, listening to my parents talk about their time here many years ago before any of their children existed. Then it hit fast forward after a brief visit to the UK with my (now ex) boyfriend, followed by the crashing realisation that I’d not only dug myself a rut but I’d pulled the soil over my head so I wouldn’t notice I’d turned my back on my dream.
It still took me another four months to come to the realisation that the rut wasn’t going to go away as long as I stayed in that relationship. And another year after that to buy the plane ticket that was my ultimate means of escape. That’s because changing your life doesn’t happen all of a sudden. It’s a calculated and logical process of steps that you have to decide to do and then follow through with. It’s not as simple as saying “I’m going to end my relationship, quit my job and move to the other side of the world”, every single part of that requires thought and debate and time.
The Next Steps
I had to end my relationship, and then find a new housemate to see out the end of my lease. I had to see out the end of my lease, while saving as much money as I could and learning to be by myself again, while trying to figure out who I was. I had to weigh up the pros and cons and face the very real damage I could potentially be doing to my career by quitting when I did. I had to sell all of my belongings and have several more arguments with my ex about whether we did the right thing. I moved three times in the year and a half between ending my relationship and moving to London. And of course, I fell in love, I lost 13 kilos, I obtained a Diploma of Business and I started writing again, something I hadn’t done since I finished university in 2010.
My point is, that you can make a decision to change something in your life all of a sudden but that doesn’t mean the change will happen all of sudden. No decision you make between now and the day you die will be instantaneous; some of them just happen a little faster than others. Even ordering food that gets delivered in less than hour requires some thought and planning and follow through.
You don’t just wake up one day and you’re okay; you have to go through the process of being okay, and getting there through time and perseverance. But there’s one thing that’s for damn sure.
You’re never going to get there by doing nothing.
So why not make that big decision today?
Photo by Lauren Mancke